If we had a way of knowing what events would happen in our lives and gave our Creator some sort of consent form to sign whether or not we want to be born and see our life course from birth till death then not having that knowledge once we are– I would decline. I never would have thought I would live during a Global Pandemic and Social Unrest (which given only lasted a week, but did cause major racial problems).
Many have lost loved ones unexpectedly from Covid and from non-Covid related deaths as well. I can count by one hand how many people have died who I have had known. That is a lot of deaths in a span of two years. It just comes to show how fragile life is, it never occurred to me that I would come to realise that. You may think that being young, death has nothing on you, but the reality is death has no age requirement. If it is time, it is time. Not only, is death a concern in this day and age, but social, economic and personal problems add to many worries that we all face.
I know man can not solve all mankind’s problems, the problems that have been solved such as breaking racial prejudice, which is not really solved. In all it is saddening. 2020 took the world by shock and had the entire globe at a standstill, 2021 it is still with us and last month South Africa was in a panic due to looting for a political cause.
As a youth looking into potentially unemployment, economic scare and living through a virus. The future looks bleak, it does not look promising. These events do not give us the certainty of finding jobs promised to us from a young age when we were told to follow our dreams to earn money. Being a young adult who is trying to build a foundation for the future, that motto and the same song that has been sung to us from young to our youth, is failing at keeping us motivated to achieve the goals, we have set for ourselves.
Is there a point to my whining and my concerns? Yes! I need to find out, am I the only young adult who feels like this? Are the worries that I am experiencing something normal that people my age experience? Then I remembered what I learnt in Development Psychology. Emerging young adults age range starts from 18 to 25. During this stage of development, psychologically young adults are trying to figure out what career they will be developing skills on, what is their true identity and what sort of lifestyle they want to live (Santrock, 2021). That is why young adults may have a desire to finish a degree, find a perfect spouse and get married sometimes in this order. Some can do it all at once, those are the ones I call unusually strong ones. Me, on the other hand, can not do all three, nahhh sorry it is not for me.
But before you jump the gun, ask yourself. Am I an emerging adult? Here is how you identify yourself.
Am I an Emerging Adult?
Identity Exploration
Remember entering your teens, you were learning things about your personality and your changing body. You were starting to get interested in romantic business, that you knew you were going to get throbbed by your parents, but you took the risk anyway. You were learning what you like and didn't, you were experimenting with many things, and learning from mistakes. Well, guess what!!! It does not end you repeat the same process in entering adulthood, but this time you have more freedom to do what you want.
You start to think about what you truly want in your life and have the freedom o do what you want since it is a time where your parents watch from the distance. Personally speaking, it is quite frightening since you have no one to blame but yourself if you make mistakes.
2. Instability
It is all about doing everything for the first time and taking a risk. instability is all about welcoming change that can be starting to work, moving out of your parent's house and living on your own. Taking risks in love, work and education, and learning to make it work and maintaining what you have, is what Instability is all about in young adulthood because you have to make it work.
3. Self-Focused
Yes, we are more worried and concerned about ourselves and constantly wanting to be in on our own, thinking about what I want and what I need. It is not to say we are being selfish but is important to understand that we are worried about ourselves and what we want from our own lives and to be left alone to our own device. For it is our own lives, and if we do not want to put what we want first, you would have resentment towards those who you allowed to tell you what you have to do with your life. So, it is important to put yourself first in what you need out of your life and put your happiness first, because it is no use making others happy with your life choices since if it does not make you happy, you are the one who lives with the decision.
4. Feeling in-between
I think I speak for everyone, emerging adults do not consider themselves as teenagers and true adults. We definitely know we are not teenagers, but we do not truly feel like adults either, we are in-between, in the awkward stage. It does feel strange, relearning things about yourself, seeing the change in your interest and noticing the change in your thoughts.
5. The age of Possibilities
It is the time when anything and everything is possible!!! It is the opportunity to transform your life into whatever you want and desire your life to be. Psychologist Jeffery Arnet describes two ways how emerging adulthood is a time of endless possibilities:
Emerging Adults are optimistic about the future (which is true)
Emerging adults who had experienced hard times growing up have a more positive direction because they want to change their circumstances (Santrock, 2021).
If this is how you feel, well Welcome to your Early Twenties!!! Not always so fun, but it is all about how you make it. It is exciting to be in the unknown but also having faith that you will get where you want to be in life. Just trust the process.
For those who are carers focused here are some questions to ask yourself? Either you are studying or looking into studying or just finding a job. You watch movies about people who hate their jobs such as Horrible Bossies and music videos like Avicci I can be the one. Do you one day want to plan how to murder your boss and do you one day just want to end up depressed? You can hate your boss, but love your job, or you can love your job and be your own boss. So then ask yourself these questions and look at your answers and look for a job that will give you positive answers to these questions and if you just want to live a fulfilled life.
Here are questions to ask yourself career-wise
• What’s most important to you in your life?
• Why do you care about those things?
• Do you have any long-term goals?
• Why are these goals important to you?
• What does it mean to have a good life?
• What does it mean to be a good person?
• If you were looking back on your life now, how would you like to be remembered? (Santrock, 2021)
Being a young adult does not have to be so overwhelming in considering all these questions and figuring what you want to do with your life being an emerging adult. You have only been an emerging adult for eight years, so it is plenty of time to learn about yourself. I won't lie, it is overwhelming to realise that your future is in your hands, alone.
But, with these unexpected events, it’s important and life-saving for the youth to look at the positive. Take a risk and do something that is out of the box but until then, break down your goals. That could be goals of shark diving, getting your driver’s licence, getting a course you have been meaning to get or achieving spiritual matters - anything you have been meaning to do. Do not waste time! You have seen how 2020 has put everyone’s life on hold, you have seen how many lost their lives unexpectedly and yet here you are and 2021 has brought so many uncertainties to the future of our home KZN. Start thinking big, make your vision board, and make it a goal to turn many of those No into Yes. You are responsible for how you come back from this hiccup.
Remember one day you will leave this Earth, so live a life that you will remember. That is a goal I am working on putting into action. Covid just needs to calm the hell down!!!
(Smith, n.d.)
Reference List
Smith, D. [Image]. Retrieved 27 August 2022, from https://za.pinterest.com/pin/17381148553315423/.
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